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1. Something to Salute: "Naval Academy Gets First Woman Commandant of Midshipmen."

2. Please, Quit Your Day Job: "Authorities are investigating a 13-year-old girl's claims that her mother has been hosting sex parties in their Stafford home."

3. Sick of School: "Officials at Catholic University say they've learned the cause of a gastrointestinal illness that's hit dozens of students in the past three days. "

4. Separate, But Something: "The report says black males should be taught in single-sex classes by a more diverse pool of teachers. It also suggest that African-American boys take more PSAT tests and Advanced Placement classes."

5. No Butts About it, Teach: "He creates floral and abstract art by plastering his posterior and genitals with paint and pressing them against canvas. "

6. On the Other Hand, You Could Have This Teacher: "A middle school teacher who didn't have time to escort three students to the restroom is under fire for allegedly telling them to answer nature's call in a soda bottle."