The Onion: One Thing The United States Hasn't Tried (Yet) To Erase The National Debt

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Five Actresses Who Should Be Considered For A Wonder Woman Movie

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For being DC Comic's most recognizable female character, WW has been given the cinematic shaft for a long time. We've seen two incarnations of Lois Lane and countless Bat-groupies, but not one decent pitch for the Amazon in the big screen. And we're talking about a character who made armored underwear cool waaay before anyone heard of Princess Leia. So here's one humble man's suggestion for any future casting of the Wonder Woman movie. I really have three rules for casting: she has to be at least 5'10", under 45 and attractive enough to pass for a princess. Sandrine Holt - Age: 36, Height: 5'10", Relevant Movie/TV Roles: Resident Evil: Apocalypse & Mutant X Pros : She's played both a (doomed) reporter and a person with superpowers, so if she can play both, she's a shoe-in. Plus she's probably the least-known actress on this list, so they can two movies out of her cheap. Cons : While D.C. isn't as star-crazy as Marvel when it co...
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5 Actresses Who Deserve a Bigger Break

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Being the avid movie watcher that I am, I've noticed that more than one talented actress has been passed over for other talent. And by "talent," I mean, "sex tapes that 'accidentally' made it to the Internet." Well, here's one man's humble attempt to rectify the situation. The following ladies are not only talented, but beautiful. Hollywood: get off your ass and give these women more roles. DANIELLE FISHEL Noticeable TV/Movie Appearances: Boy Meets World; both National Lampoon's Dorm Dazes The delightful Ms. Fishel has the distinction of having the weirdest named ever associated with a smart-yet-hot character (or maybe I'm the only one who has a problem saying "Topanga!" whilst in the throes of passion) as well as participating in the death of the National Lampoon Series (I personally thought it died with Chevy Chase's career; who knew?). If you were to use her IMBD page as a reference, the only real fault people seem to hav...
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