Welcome to The Now

Via Comics Alliance's Worst Comics for 2010 .

Let the revolution begin .

Well, paint me green and call me Gumby : Surprise, surprise, historians have found glaring errors in a textbook claiming that African Americans fought in large numbers for the South during the Civil War. A number of additional errors have been found in other textbooks being used in some Virginia classrooms, since the state ordered a review of the books, the Washington Post reports . Among the textbooks' errors are claims that the Confederacy included 12 states and the U.S. entered World War I in 1916. Five professional scholars reviewed the books, with three of them finding "disturbing" results. State officials are scheduled to meet January 10 to review the results. "I absolutely could not believe the number of mistakes -- wrong dates and wrong facts everywhere. How in the world did these books get approved?" said Ronald Heinemann, a former history professor at Hampden-Sydney College who reviewed "Our Virginia: Past and Present." The other book

There's new research regarding what makes conservatives and liberals tick. C&L has the goods .

Here we go : CHICAGO (AP) -- Through a combination of procrastination and bad timing, many baby boomers are facing a personal finance disaster just as they're hoping to retire. Starting in January, more than 10,000 baby boomers a day will turn 65, a pattern that will continue for the next 19 years. The boomers, who in their youth revolutionized everything from music to race relations, are set to redefine retirement. But a generation that made its mark in the tumultuous 1960s now faces a crisis as it hits its own mid-60s. "The situation is extremely serious because baby boomers have not saved very effectively for retirement and are still retiring too early," says Olivia Mitchell, director of the Boettner Center for Pensions and Retirement Research at the University of Pennsylvania.

Comics Alliance caught another racist protest: apparently Batman shouldn't be recruiting Muslims for his franchise .

I remember getting some condescending calls at work from customers regarding last year's snow; these people were apparently from states that get snow regularly and couldn't understand why Maryland and D.C. weren't are prepared. I tried to explain to them that for us, it wasn't regular snowfall, but no no avail. So imagine my shock to see this NYT story about criticism toward New York Mayor Bloomberg . Fortunately, not every mayor had this problem .

I'm sure there are reasons that the dragon-taming, snake-exploding boy Jesus was excluded from the final cut of the Bible.

“The world has not come to an end. The city is going fine. Broadway shows were full last night. There are lots of tourists here enjoying themselves. I think the message is that the city goes on .” "We are not saying, `Support us,'" said Faisal Masood, a graduate of the University of Illinois, Chicago, and management consultant . "But we want them to understand what our values are." "We are overwhelmed with happiness and joy at this very special moment," John and his long-time partner, David Furnish, said in a statement . "Zachary is healthy and doing really well, and we are very proud and happy parents." “Not to take responsibility from what he did, but Harvard has to own up to what it did by letting him in,’’ said Steven Sussman, Wheeler’s attorney . “There were substantial irregularities with the Wheeler application that should have raised red flags that were ignored.’’

She was 54. NewsOne is all over this, with some of her top songs , her impact on soul music , and five things you probably didn't know about her .

A cool surprise for some MD high schoolers. John McCain goes out swinging ...angrily. Top Ten overrated movies for 2010 .

Of course considering that the Orange Lantern represent greed, you may wonder way he would bake cookies...well, it makes sense in context .

The Cracked.com way .

"and the nfl is waging war on thanksgiving. the rose bowl is waging war on my hangover." -- "ilikeike," commenting on a Media Matters post about Fox News' latest bout with stupidity .

Not for the politically correct . You've been warned.

“I’m ready for the next game, to be honest with you. I want to play. It’s kind of cool that this game happened [early in] our season . Because when you get to the end of the year you have this emptiness because your season is over. But now we have this high, but we can still play. So, I’m loving it.’’ "When you get the very cold air mixing in with the very warm air, it can be quite volatile ." "The reason they don’t work in some people is that they are rundown. If you have a poor diet and aren’t taking care of yourself and getting enough rest, don't expect it to work ." " Apps must comply will all local laws and may not put an individual or targeted group in harms way ." " The bottom line : for now, gay, lesbian, and bisexual service members must remain cautiously closeted. " I have been a member of Weight Watchers for 23 years and I'm back on it right now." "It was a rocky relationship from what I understand, a lot of u

That was basically the message from senators Kyle and DeMint, which was also a subtle dig at Harry Reid . Reid responded in kind . Also, Roland Martin gives his own perspective of this exchange .

When politicians like Newt Gingrich are begging strippers for cash . Oh, did I mention that he has a history with this particular establishment?

" It is sometimes difficult to understand why I still have to warn the public about the presence of hexavalent chromium in drinking water 23 years after my colleagues and I first sounded the alarm." “ Ratification of the New Start treaty is vital to U.S. national security .” “ At Harvard, ROTC has been like the crazy uncle in the attic : We know he’s up there but we don’t want to tell anyone that he’s there.’’ " He revealed himself as a sociopath who fooled the entire family and killed his best friend, who was ... the best man ."

The guys over at Bullets Forever are doing Gilbert Arenas Tribute Day, and this is one of their entries .

"Because it is an overtly religious place, it's not strange or weird to care about your religion here, to pray and make God a priority." -- Reef Al-Shabnan, explaining why he and many other Muslim students are enrolling in Catholic universities . While we're on the subject, here's some myths about Islam that have been debunked...by Cracked.com, of all places .

If you're unfamiliar with the game, info can be found here and here .

( pic via ) I don't think too many people would ever accuse the Black Eyed Peas of being original anyway. Way to ruin any chance of having a basketball career . Now I may watch a "Fast and Furious" movie. Shorter C-SPAN callers : Michael Steele shouldn't be RNC Chair anymore because he's black. Actually, I believe TIME magazine thinks we're all idiots . Foods you'd be better off not serving during the holidays . Consider raising your children here . Victoria Beckham looked like an extra from "Saved By the Bell" when she was 18.

About time . And in case some people thought that every Senate Democrat was behind the repeal ...

Cool.

A study says that those who follow Fox News aren't really that knowledgeable on the issues . Kinda defeats the whole purpose of watching a news channel, doesn't it? Then again, with Rashomon Journalism , one can't be too surprised.

From NewsOne : There is a new trailer for “MOOZ-Lum,” which stars Nia Long, Evan Ross and Roger Guenveur Smith. The movie is about a Black Muslim family and a young Muslim man’s experience with prejudice and racism on a college campus following 9/11. The movie will be in limited release, February 11th 2011. Sounds interesting. I'm sure the anti-Muslim Freakout Crowd will be addressing this about a week before it hits theaters.

What can I say but, "Thank you, Internet!"

The tax deal has passed. Here's how some of the media portrayed the story: The New York Times WASHINGTON — Congress at midnight Thursday approved an $801 billion package of tax cuts and $57 billion for extended unemployment insurance. The vote sealed the first major deal between President Obama and Congressional Republicans as Democrats put aside their objections and bowed to the realignment of power brought about by their crushing election losses. The bipartisan support for the tax deal also underscored the urgency felt by the administration and by lawmakers in both parties to prop up the still-struggling economy and to prevent an across-the-board tax increase that was set to occur if the rates enacted under President George W. Bush had expired, as scheduled, at the end of the month. TRANSLATION: The Democrats caved and voted for a tax cut extension in order to help an economy that hasn't been helped by said tax cuts previously. Also, this is the first time Oba

We have what would have been a (sadly) normal occurrence in the retail world : Two men were in an east Houston jewelry store Thursday afternoon pretending to be customers when a third man burst into the store and stated, "This is a robbery," Houston police spokesman Kese Smith said. They then proceed to tie up the owner and his wife. Well, I should say "try" instead of "proceed": As they were trying to tie up the store owner, the 52-year-old took out a handgun from his waistband and fatally shot one of the suspects, Smith said. The store owner then grabbed a shotgun and shot and killed the two other suspects in the ensuring gunbattle, Smith said. I know; "Wow!" Yeah, it's amazing how that went down. Especially when you learn that: The newspaper said Castillo was in critical but stable condition at hospital after suffering gunshot wounds to his left shoulder, left abdomen and legs. Whoa, and his wife? The woman was unharmed, police said

North Korea continues to flex . Paging Gotham City ... They fought the law , and... Curb Stomp Battle: San Diego-style . Well, if you're going to treat them like animals, might as well . Curb Stomp Battle: Boston-style .

Apparently some people believes that a black Englishmen can't play Nordic Gods in a movie based on comic book characters. CA has the story on these racists .

Another so-called family values candidate charged with assault . Hulkimania's still running wild . Parents get low marks for their part in their child's educational development. Selective transparency is the status quo . The irony here is that her false story may now come true, just not exactly how she told it.

What gets me about this one is that the barbers had guns .

Don't know if this is really a "yay" moment, but it is what it is.

Zoinks ! LITCHFIELD, Conn. – Prosecutors say actor Rip Torn has pleaded guilty to charges stemming from allegations he broke into a Connecticut bank while drunk and armed.

( pic via ) More proof that the only good news concerning a war is that it's over. When a cigarette company markets their product to a 9-yr-old, they deserve to be sued . The alternative to having your daughter where a chastity belt. All this tells me is that I still have a shot. The Marines are the last military barrier to repealing DADT . Most meetings use gavels, not guns .

I wasn't aware of this until I received this email , but one of the benefits from the tax cut deal includes an extension of "employee-provided education assistance." Translated, those involved can offer up to $5,250 a year for classes. In my case, that means if I take a class, as long as the cost is under that amount I don't have to pay for anything other than books. Since I'm going for my MBA, I can take two classes per year and only worry about having to pay on the taxes for one of them (which they take out of my paycheck, BTW). That's a big deal to me because it cuts my paycheck by almost 23%. I'm not saying it's a complete justification for accepting a flawed deal, but their are plenty of people out there who will get cut off academically and probably never resume their degree-hunt if the assistance is cut off. BTW, it looks like it will pass the Senate . What happens when the House gets their hands on it is a different story.

Whoa .

( pic via ) Tips for guys on meeting women . Fitness myths . What Wikileaks revealed about the American media . For some actors/actresses, it isn't acting . Other things that can give you acne . I would like to think teens aren't trying to get pregnant to be on a fucking TV show, but there you go . If you ignore these subtle signs , a heart attack may be in your future. The Bea Arthur you didn't know .

When I said, " Don't be so surprised ," I meant it .

Old guy (67 yrs) cause a ruckus at Burger King, gets into it with employee. Old guy tries to hit employee, misses, gets punched by employee, and dies . And before anyone starts dumping on the (younger) employee, let's not forget that video a few years back of Old Guy Beating Crap Out of Young Guy On Bus, in which that Old Guy was basically canonized (the lesson? If you're old and you connect, you can be a hero).

About freaking time .

Actually, this is typical Gilbert : he talks about being a changed person, accepting his role with the team, and how people don't understand him. What sticks out to me is that he said he learned a lesson in ego-checking from watching Allen Iverson's last moments in the NBA.

"Paul Rudd is so good at playing a dick boyfriend that Rihanna ducks when she watches Wet Hot American Summer." -- Cracked.com's Seanbaby .

Cracked.com does it again .

Video game's answer to Indiana Jones is back again .

In other news, water is wet .

I'm not going to say that the Democrats in Congress or President Obama is salvaging what they can. I'm not saying that they shouldn't fight. I won't say that the liberal/progressive base deserve to be ignored. I will say that no one should be surprised. And no, not because "Obama said 'X' and now he's doing 'Y.'" How is that different from Clinton? Sure, he gave us that awesome surplus, but even Thom Hartmann has talked about how Clinton governed with a conservative slant. People tend to forget that because the guy was a Democrat. No, we shouldn't be surprised because of two basic things that have been constant since Ronald Reagan came in and did a curb stomp on progressive politics: The elected Democrats fear the GOP base more than their own; Liberals and Progressives have not successfully infiltrated the Democratic Party. On point one: I've said this over and over and over again; and here's why: elected Democrats, like your av

No, really; the tax cuts was a political trap . Time for Obama to realize that the GOP does not plan on playing nice .

Actually, Khloe, that guy should be in jail . Operation: Bring Pat Riley Back is in full swing. Five Hip-Hop Myths . Mr. Nolan: I'm not so sure about this idea . A Candid Colbert ? Cool. How to get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame . Michael Moore wants to have dinner with you . Self-destruction ; you're headed for self-destruction... Those wacky dictators . More proof that Glenn Beck doesn't listen to himself . I usually prefer to not mix sports and politics, but this is too good to pass up .

... it shouldn't be this hard . But when a political party fears their opponent's base more than their own, the easy tends to become complicated.

Congrats to Tempestt Bledsoe .

A homophobic Christian is accusing a progressive Muslim of backing gay rights in order to institute Sharia law which would call for gays to be persecuted. --"ArrivalofGodot," pretty much summarizing this TPM story .

Media Matters had two separate posts regarding the Lame Duck House of Representative's vote on the Bush Tax Cuts, one about Fox Nation's response , and one about Fox and Friends . In both, a member by the name of "whatithink" posted two very informative notes. The first was about how tax cuts work : I don't think conservatives realize just exactly what they are getting so upset about. Let's say I make $249,000/yr. I would still get the Bush tax cuts. Let's say I make $251,000/yr. I would still get the Bush tax cuts on $250,000 and the extra $1 would get taxed at a higher rate. If a person makes over $250k/yr, that doesn't mean they get no tax cut at all. It means the portion that exceeds the $250k gets taxed at a higher rate. Get it yet? So all this crying that people making over $250k/yr will get no tax cut is a bunch of BS. EVERYBODY , from you, me, to the movie stars who make $20 million a picture, gets the same tax cuts on the fi

As entertaining as it was, it was done by someone else .

The Real Life Destro himself, Oliver North, that's who! He thinks that if gay people (who already serve in the military, BTW) actually started to admit that they were gay in public, then the straight soldiers would turn into mush and trample each other trying to leave the military. Which means that we'll have to have a draft in order to replenish our ranks. Me? I have a feeling that if we had kept the draft, we probably wouldn't still be talking about withdrawing fully from the two wars we're involved with now. Because, you know, we might not have fought them throughout Bush's two terms. Anyway, Media Matters sets Mr. North straight .

LeBron has no idea the level of hate he's going to encounter . David Brian Mitchell is a sicko . A Creationist Theme Park . 'Nuff said. Brett Farve quits again . For real this time. Honest.

Media Matters documents how Glenn Beck's "perfect storm" is really a broken record .

With the report on DADT coming out in favor of repeal, the Senate's biggest holdout John McCain now has to insult the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, the Secretary of Defense and the POTUS in order to make a new standard (it's no secret that the Marine Corps is the biggest military hurdle to repeal while the other branches are either pro-repeal or indifferent). But as TPM notes, that swipe at Sec. Gates isn't accurate . If McCain doesn't think gays should serve, he should just say so.

Sounds pretty accurate to me : LeBron James thinks he’s as dedicated to the game as Kobe Bryant, Tim Duncan, Steve Nash and Tyler Hansbrough. Nope. He’s more talented, the game comes easier to LeBron. He can excel in the NBA without ever submitting to coaching. He can earn lifetime financial security without ever attending college or grinding at the bottom of the corporate ladder. He can win friends and be popular with women without ever demonstrating humility or showing respect. You wonder why Big Ben Roethlisberger tried to have sex with a college student inside a nightclub closet/bathroom? Probably because he had before. People do what works. If bad habits get rewarded, people never interpret them as bad habits. LeBron James bullies the coaches who dare to coach him, who dare to try to define for him the sacrifices necessary for true greatness. According to an ESPN story, the Heat players, particularly LeB

Please Hammer Anderson Cooper; don't hurt 'em .

Because they wouldn't allow him to be honest enough to Republicans to tell them that they need to drop Sarah Palin like a bad habit .

For most jobs, this is known as "and other duties as required." Terrorists in Disguise . Creating a new generation of working poor. R.I.P., Leslie Nielsen . Shorter Rep. King : Because Wikileaks is exposing the dark underbelly of American government (you know, the thing the Tea Party claims to hate) we should just label them a terrorist organization . This explains why I couldn't get a connection yesterday . Can't wait for that Comcast/NBC merger! Say what you will about Kim Kardashian, the lady can pick some causes .

Flight Attendants were prefer you to act like a mature adult when flying . Judging by all the pastries , Ms. Cyrus might not be able to wear that outfit again. Better than stripping, I guess. Eva Longoria isn't exactly innocent . Ex-NFL wife doesn't buy Steve Harvey's relationship philosophy . Uncanny Valley, here we come .

No other way to describe it, really .

Me neither.

It's not who you think .

What makes this story special is that drugs and Kilpatrick's wife were involved . Sheesh.

After his first two years, Ronald Reagan was at 35%. As seen here , here , and here .

( pic via ) Superhero Action Twitter Role Playing . No, that's not Jamie Kennedy's blond twin sister . Disney Princess + Star Wars Sith Lord = This . There's hope for me yet . What is read cannot be unread . DC is bringing back Doomsday . The best and worst Mega Man weapons (although Top Spin is up for debate ; serious debate ). P. Diddy won't always help your career .

He's totally spooning her . I don't care what anyone says.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news , world news , and news about the economy

Karl Rove really doesn't want the GOP to embrace Sarah Palin as a candidate , but Fox News likes her sooo much. What's gonna happen when more Bush Administration people start to chime in? Ann Coulter is not a conservative; she's a thin-skinned pundit who says crazy stuff to stay relevant, as evidenced by her confrontation with an actual conservative . Shorter Tony Perkins : If gay soldiers are allowed to admit that they're gay, we'll need to re-institute the draft.

I know people are unset on the way DWTS is playing out, but no need to grab the firearms .

Totally awesome at first glance ? CHECK !! But upon multiple viewings, you notice some odd things like: The guns don't look real; as in, "The guns look like Deadpool and Lady Deadpool bought them at Toys 'R Us." CHECK The tips of the arrows in Deadpool's back should be protruding out of front of his body a little bit. CHECK Or, how about the fact that even though these two are both deadly assassins known for using guns and swords with relative efficiency, they still choose to use bows and arrows ? CHECK Considering where they are currently aiming, neither will shoot/cut the other. CHECK If those are supposed to be "handguns," they're a tad long . CHECK Deadpool is drawn like he's standing over Lady Deadpool, while Lady Deadpool is drawn like she's falling? CHECK Lady Deadpool's right arm is slightly more toned than her left? CHECK Now by no means is this Liefeld's worst. It's just that he has this knack for wowing on the initial t

...but not in a good way, more like a " push off a cliff " way. I don't know what's crazier: that these people actually plotted this or that they thought that a filmmaker was more dangerous to their bottom line than, say, a politician.

Dude; what the fuck ? Text messages? TEXT MESSAGES ? Do these sports cats learn anything? Why are y'all still using cell phone for your jump-offs? They record everything . And your teammate wife? What. The. Hell? You're supposed to share the ball, not the wife. And certainly the most important thing: how could you do this to your wife? Have you seen her fucking show? It's all about older MILFs banging their poolboys and their daughter's boyfriends. She's sees young meat everyday, and she's an attractive female, so you know there's at least been some mild flirtation..but she wasn't sending them booty-call requests, was she? She kept her shit under control. But you? You? You go ahead and hook-up with a teammate's wife? Again: What the fuck?

Now this loser claims he was born to be president . Look, until you start winning elections, you shouldn't be talking about how great you are politically and what you think you'll accomplish. Especially when you can barely muster any support from your own political party.

via Comics Alliance . UPDATE: Cracked.com's Daniel O'Brien is not impressed .

As Oliver and TPM both note, MD has a new representative who is complaining about not getting his job-related government health care. The irony/hypocrisy of this story is that he ran against "Obamacare," which he once called "entitlement." I'm longing for the day when a majority of our representatives actually practice what they preach (or preach against).

She has her own reality show /infomercial. Her daughter my be the next winner of Dancing With The Stars (even though she hasn't been the best dancer). And for Pete's Sake: a word she made up will no probably be part of the Dictionary . To be honest, running for president is the last thing she should do. Why be president when you can be the next Oprah?

Privacy is perceptive . Don't eat Gorgonzola cheese . UMCP, NASA and a professor named Sunshine . For Afghanistan: baby steps .

( pic via ) Don't collect any of these . Time for understanding . So...it's possible to be your boss' boss ? Comic artist John Bryne (and others): the new Cassandra ? Turn Miami Heat's Big Three into a Big Two ? Odd are if an ex-athlete is running for office, they're Republican . Pretty interesting re-imaginings . Death By Burger . The porn priest . Joe Jackson: Yeah, I beat my kids to keep them out of jail .

It's dumb that I can't watch my alma mater play on TV (despite the fact I live 20 minutes away) but at least we seem to be beating on teams again .

WTF, Jack Johnson ? WashPost has more .

Who knew kissing could be physically and financially beneficial ?

... especially after hearing some of the things coming out of the mouths of pilots , such as: “The truth is, we’re exhausted. Our work rules allow us to be on duty 16 hours without a break. That’s many more hours than a truck driver. And unlike a truck driver, who can pull over at the next rest stop, we can’t pull over at the next cloud.” “At some airports with really short runways, you’re not going to have a smooth landing no matter how good we are: John Wayne Airport; Jackson Hole, Wyoming; Chicago Midway; and Reagan National.” “There’s no such thing as a water landing. It’s called crashing into the ocean.” “I’ve been struck by lightning twice. Most pilots have. Airplanes are built to take it. You hear a big boom and see a big flash and that’s it. You’re not going to fall out of the sky.” “There is no safest place to sit. In one accident, the people in the back are dead; in the next, it’s the people up front.” “Please don’t complain to me about your lost bags or the rotten service or

By way of ESPN's Kurt Snibbe: Part 1 & Part 2 .

Some guy has a self-publicized book called, "The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure." Amazon.com is selling it, and defending the fact that they sell it . Why do I call this "capitalism?" Because the Amazon story represents the core of this economic philosophy: as long as you can make some money doing it, go for it . There is no moral imperative when you take capitalism at its purest form, which is why you need laws and policies to regulate it. Otherwise, some company would be selling candy-flavored cigarettes to five-year-olds.

Kewl .

Their mutual love for "Desperate Housewives," for starters.

C'mon; you know the answer .

For be for me to disagree with someone who been in more movies than I have, but I don't think, " Good actors...never us the script unless it's amazing writing " is a true statement. More here .

From The Boston Globe : Cities and towns across the state are diverting large sums of money to “rainy day’’ accounts even as they lay off employees and make deep cuts to schools and services, girding for what many believe will be a long period of austerity. Municipal leaders give a variety of reasons — cuts in state aid, anticipated increases in health care costs, dwindling federal stimulus funds — but the financial stockpiling is also a signal they fear the funding enjoyed before the financial collapse will not return anytime soon. “This is the new normal,’’ said Mayor Dean J. Mazzarella of Leominster, which set aside $3 million this year while it also made sharp cuts that included layoffs. “And we need to adjust.’’ The increase in savings is significant — even surprising. Municipalities saved, on average, more than 6 percent of their fiscal 2009 budgets, the highest rate since at least 1994. Meanwhile, over in The New York Times ... Republicans who have taken over state

Dallas Cowboys fire Wade Phillips .

Did you ever watch G.I. Joe when you were a kid, Uzi ? No, actually. I know, I led a deprived existence . There's an episode called "Cobra's Candidate" where Cobra is interfering in a mayoral election. Because, you know, local government is the prime target for international terrorist groups . Chris Sims and David Uzumeri , managing to tie Smallville, G.I. Joe, and our current political discourse into one exchange .

Best take down of the "Tea Party Anger" I've read since they were "created."

Heh .

What The Tea Party wants . Holy expansion, Batman ! Not made in the U.S.A. (anymore). Is Spider-Man really the hero we think he is ?