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  1. An Italian woman was brought out of a coma, got married, then went back into her coma.
  2. The Colts avoid being 0-2; the Patriots manage to beat the Jets (again).
  3. Meanwhile, in Afghanistan...
  4. If this is a sign of our strong economy, than I'm Johnny Friggin' Depp.
  5. I think I know why it seems like (in his closing days) Bush is adopting Obama's policies: because when the overall Bush Doctrine (which is 99.97% Cheney/Rumsfeld, 0.02% Bush and 0.01% Obama) ultimately fails, the pundits (read FoxNews) will get to blame Obama.

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